When I was younger I remember we had this back room in my house with a computer setup and speakers. Every once and a while, my mama would put on some music and I’d play dress up in this ridiculous old black leather skirt of hers and then I would dance like a stripper to Christina Aguilera. It’s honestly the reason I love dancing too but mostly it was those days when I used to play dress up in my mom’s old clothes and just be without the fear of ‘fitting in’ or wearing the ‘right’ clothes. Those days were bliss. Fast forward to every phase I ever had growing up that ended in me purging my closet. There was the Aeropostale shirt and matching sweatpants phase with my lucky Adidas slides in 7th grade. Then in 10th grade I actually went to a magnet program so I had no control over what I wore to school 5 days out of the week. The weekend, on the other hand was rife with experimentation. I went through a lot of booty shorts of every variety (short, really short, skimpy, rips, holes, tight, loose, cotton, gym, etc.) and tube top combinations. Throughout my senior year and after highschool, a friend of mine and her sister were just going through their closets and started to give me their old clothes on a regular basis. I decided since I was always getting things from them that I didn’t need to shop for any more stuff. Boy, was I wrong! It wasn’t until I got my first credit card in my second year of college that I went on a shopping spree and nearly maxed it out on the first try. LOL. I felt like I was rejuvenated. Of course because it’s in ingrained in me, I got everything at a thrift store. It just goes against my nature to get anything full price. That being said you can imagine I don’t have anything designer.
I’ve always been a firm believer in wearing what makes you comfortable so I invest in a lot of good long-lasting jeans and cotton t-shirts. They’re a staple in my wardrobe. From all the phases I went through, I learned one very important thing. It matters more that I wear what I want and not what is considered ‘trendy.’ It was always hard for me as a awkward white girl to find a place where I fit in with all the ‘prettier’ girls around me. It took me a long time to get over my body image insecurities and I talk more about this in my Ode to Beauty for my Beauty page. I feel like this time in my life reminds me of Britney Spears’ song “Not a Girl Not Yet a Woman.” I still wanna play dress up and try on different outfits but now I want to include a comfort in my wardrobe that wasn’t there throughout my adolescence. I’m still coming into my own and I know what I wear will reflect that. I hope to take everyone who’s reading on this journey with me. From probably another stint in sweatpants to maybe some ball gowns? Who knows? I guess you’ll just have to wait and see.
xoxo Darcy Mae Modica